The Hidden Half of College Admissions: What Families Are Getting Wrong
Every year, thousands of students rush to fill their résumés with clubs, awards, and leadership titles—believing that quantity equals success. But in reality, this approach misses what Thomas Caleel, former Wharton Admissions Director and host of The Admittedly Podcast, calls the hidden half of college admissions: the story that ties it all together.
Admissions officers don’t just ask what a student has done. They ask why they did it, how it connects, and what it reveals about who that student is becoming. Without that thread, even the most accomplished applicants can disappear into the crowd.
Why Grades and Activities Alone Don’t Set Students Apart
A 4.0 GPA, leadership titles, or 10 extracurriculars no longer guarantee distinction. As Caleel explains, “You’re editor of the school newspaper? Great—but so are thousands of other students.”
Admissions officers aren’t looking for generic excellence. They’re looking for intentional excellence; students who can connect their achievements to genuine interests, personal growth, and future direction.
One former student, for instance, was captain of two sports teams, president of a club, and held a part-time job. On paper, impressive. But in conversation, it became clear she had no cohesive reason behind those choices—no story. Once she narrowed her focus to a few activities that reflected her interest in community psychology, her application came alive.
That shift from doing everything to doing what matters is the foundation of narrative coherence.
What Is Narrative Coherence—and Why Does It Matter So Much?
Narrative coherence means that every part of a student’s application—grades, activities, essays, recommendations—works together to tell a consistent, authentic story. It shows self-awareness, growth, and direction.
Admissions readers spend only a few minutes per file. What catches their attention isn’t just achievement, it’s clarity. When they can quickly answer, “Who is this student, and what drives them?” that student stands out.
Take one student interested in theater and design. She didn’t just list “school play” and “art club.” She explored how costume design brings characters to life, interned with a local theater, and researched fashion history. By the time she applied to NYU’s Gallatin School, her story—bridging art, business, and performance—was unmistakable. That clarity made her unforgettable.
What Happens When Students Lack a Clear Narrative?
Without introspection, students often become “activity collectors.” They stack their schedules with clubs and volunteer work, hoping volume will impress. Instead, it signals a lack of direction.
Parents sometimes unintentionally reinforce this pattern. Between carpool lines and dinner-table updates, it’s easy to equate busyness with success. But as Caleel notes, “Most students are just doing a bunch of things—not very well.”
The antidote is reflection. Ask your student:
- Why am I drawn to this activity?
- What am I learning about myself through it?
- How does it connect to what I value or hope to study?
Those answers, not a checklist, form the story admissions officers remember.
How Introspection Can Turn Setbacks Into Strengths
The hidden half of college admissions isn’t just about achievements, it’s about growth. Some of the most powerful stories come from students who faced setbacks, reflected, and took ownership.
Caleel recalls one student at boarding school who violated an alcohol policy, faced consequences, and worked to rebuild trust. Instead of hiding the mistake, she used it to show maturity—creating a peer support group that still exists today.
Her story wasn’t about perfection. It was about resilience, leadership, and impact. She was admitted to her dream school, even after being told it was “out of reach.”
Authenticity Always Wins
Another student, working full-time to support his family, struggled at first to express his experience on paper. His essays sounded defensive, until he began writing about what he actually did: caring for horses before sunrise, attending virtual classes mid-shift, and returning to the stables until dark.
By focusing on what the work taught him—patience, empathy, responsibility—his essays transformed. He earned early admission to his top-choice university on a full scholarship.
The lesson? Authenticity outshines artifice. Admissions officers can spot the difference instantly.
What Can Families Do Now?
Families can start building narrative coherence early—ideally in middle school or early high school. The goal isn’t to map a lifelong career, but to help students make intentional choices that align with their developing interests and values.
Here are three questions Caleel recommends families revisit regularly:
- What activities genuinely energize you?
- What themes connect your strongest experiences?
- How are you growing from what you’re doing right now?
When students can answer these, they stop chasing a résumé and start telling a story.
The Takeaway
The hidden half of college admissions isn’t about doing more. It’s about doing what matters, and doing it with clarity. The students who stand out aren’t the busiest. They’re the most intentional.
As Thomas Caleel reminds families, “Grades open the door. Your story gets you inside.”
Q&A: Common Family Questions About Narrative Coherence
Q: What if my student doesn’t know what they want to study yet?
A: That’s fine. Narrative coherence isn’t about locking in a major—it’s about curiosity. Schools want students who explore thoughtfully and reflect on what they learn.
Q: Can a student’s story change over time?
A: Absolutely. In fact, it should evolve. The goal is to connect the dots between experiences, not force them to stay in one lane.
Q: How early should students start thinking about this?
A: Ideally by freshman year. The earlier students develop awareness around their interests, the more authentic and intentional their trajectory becomes. If you don’t know where to start, read Demystifying the Admissions Process: Navigating Your Unique Path to College
Q: What’s one sign a student’s story isn’t clear yet?
A: If they struggle to explain why they do each activity—or how their experiences connect—that’s a red flag. Reflection is the first step to fixing it.
Final Thoughts
At Admittedly, our team of former Ivy League admissions officers and elite educators helps families build this clarity every day. If you’re ready to develop your student’s narrative strategy with expert guidance, you can apply for a Family Action Call at apply.admittedly.co.
Because in today’s admissions landscape, success isn’t about checking boxes—it’s about telling a story that no one else can.
